One of the most common questions I get from my clients is how to talk to their kids—and how to get the kids through a divorce. It’s an emotional and scary time, and the last thing any of us wants is to say or do the “wrong” thing.
If you Google “what to tell the kids about divorce,” you’ll find experts with academic advice—like, present a united front and avoid the blame game. My clients tell me that’s helpful—but they also wonder how real people work through these very difficult issues in real life.
So I turned to my closest friends who are children of divorce to see whether their experiences would align with the experts—or if their personal experience with divorce could generate more nuanced insight. I learned so much from those conversations that I asked my friends if I could share their answers here—and they were generous enough to allow me to do so.
In this multi-part blogpost, I’ll share my friends’ unique responses to the following two questions:
1. Now that you're able to look back on your parents' divorce, what piece of advice do you wish you could have given them to make the divorce easier on you or to better support you through the transition?
2. What is one thing you wish your parents had told you during the process (or what is the most helpful thing your parents told you)?
Stay tuned for their answers. And thank you once again to my closest friends for being willing to share these insights with parents now grappling with the challenge of divorcing with kids.